Rasha: Are there things we liked about this episode? I’ll start with mine: 1. In an episode that threatened, on the surface, to be an All-Hawley show, we saw pleasingly less of him than we have in some episodes where he’s just Hawley Ex Machina. Which means that: 2. We saw Jenny and Abbie roll together. I live for that moment in the pawn shop where McPawny is like “well, if it isn’t Jenny Mills.” and Abbie is like “Abbie Mills, too, get ready.”
Gemma: Jenny and Abbie’s mutual badassitude was fun.
R: YES! Were there any things you liked about this episode?
G: 1. Jaime Murray. She’ll always be Lila on Dexter to me, the beginning of that season before the writing went El Destructo, and it’s fun to see her vamp it up.
R: I knew I remembered her!! She played almost exactly the same role.
G: My understanding is she plays almost exactly the same role all the time, though I haven’t seen much of it, but it’s fun.
R: I did totally think she was a vampire at first. And my mom was like, well, she’s a vampire, right?
G: 2. Irving’s invisibility in the mirror and the possibility of Katrina being deceitful and bringing down the team.
R: YASS. I actually liked Katrina in this episode.
G: I will never go that far. But it did open the possibility of her being interesting, which is new. Made me intrigued for Weird Wispy Puppetmaster Spirit Henry’s re-emergence.
R: I’m down with her becoming so obsessed with finding her demon-warlock ancient baby son that she ends up going Evil Willow.
G: Yeah, was it just me, or was this episode way Buffy the Headless Slayer-er than most?
R: Way. Someone else clearly directed this episode, and the writing took a very different turn. My mom was also thinking it seemed more like Grimm, which worries me.
G: Maybe it was just all the lightning-fast movement of the baddies.
R: There were a lot of long takes and steady-cam work. Someone got let out of their room to go directing. Thing I liked #3. I laughed watching this episode, even as I found myself bored/creeped out/not emotionally invested in the Oedipal relationship between Hawley and his godmother/temptress.
G: When did you laugh?
R: Karaoke was fun. I forget, there was something else too.
G: Yeah, the karaoke was cute. I enjoyed Ichabod singing that mournful tune. I have been that person at karaoke, not gonna lie.
R: Me too. Gotta know your crowd.
G: For some reason when I karaoke all my crowd-reading skills go out the window. It’s an odd and specific form of anxiety.
R: Nikki B. has a fantastic voice, that was cool to discover.
R: Was it weird that Ichabod and Abbie did an Ike and Tina tune?
G: Probably reading too much into it, but yes.
R: Can we do Ike and Tina without addressing domestic violence? I mean, as a people? OK, this brings me to something else from the pawn store. I don’t know how I feel about the writers choosing to have Jenny suggest she’d accuse McDoublecross of assaulting her as a way to get him to talk. There are so many other ways that she could have threatened him. Like she could have just straight-up threatened him, and when she asked Abbie “did you see that?”, Abbie could have been all “see what? I definitely didn’t see you slam that guy into a glass counter so hard you broke it.”
R: It felt like the b*llsh*t thing that a guy would imagine a woman saying, and I don’t think a woman would joke about that. Especially not one as bad@ss as Jenny. She’ll f*ck you up with no excuse.
G: I def think there are women who would joke about that. I would accept the notion that Jenny isn’t one of them, and I would equally accept the notion that a feminist TV show probably shouldn’t. But I do feel like we’ve established that Jenny has crossed pretty much All the Lines in her time.
R: People who joke about getting assaulted are not funny, and that mess, even in fiction, feeds into the idea that women are lying when they talk about violence. Aite, I’ve said my piece.
G: I think I’m ready to voice overall disappointment with this season compared to the first. It’s much more scattered and overwritten as a result, because overwriting seems to be the only way to create cohesion.
R: I agree.
G: The premise of this ep seemed to be, “Crap, we can’t go back to the Apocalypse yet! Let’s threaten a character no one really gives a fu¢k about!”
R: Was this a slapdash exit for the weak sauce Hawley character? They seem to leave the door open for him to come back, but probably not soon.
G: That was my hope. I think this was the device for when the actor got another job. And I have to say, I appreciate a show actually making the gesture when an actor disappears. I speak as a devoted fan of The Good Wife, which SUCKS at that.
R: Which actor are you thinking of?
G: On TGW? Like, all of them. Every one of Kalinda’s lovers, Nikki Beharie’s character in S3 for that matter.
G: The writers and showrunners do it all the time, set characters up to have huge arcs and then the actors have better jobs or family issues or whatever and they just disappear and no one comments. Anyway, jeez. No stakes in this episode. She could rip him limb from limb, I do not really care, and nobody else seemed to have any emotions about it, not even Jenny.
R: FOR REAL no stakes. Ichabod explained our feelings about Hawley perfectly at the bar when he was like, “that dude’ll come back in a coupla weeks, shake it off.”
G: I think SH could get an awesome ep done where we actually only focus on things happening among actual characters we’ve been introduced to already. But somehow no one ever seems to think of that.
R: The artificially raised romantic stakes for Jenny and Hawley were trying to be a reason we should care. And they failed.
G: Because Jenny didn’t react like that once she knew Hawley was actually threatened. Which is the fault of the script, not Ms. Greenwood.
R: I hope Jenny doesn’t have to care about Hawley again.
G: Ulgh, she totally will. But I hope she has some hot sex in the meantimes.
R: Tell us how you really feel ;)
G: What, me? Never.
R: Well, this brings me back to my #2, which is how much I enjoyed the scenes with Jenny and Abbie, and Irving and his wife, and even Katrina and Irving.
G: But there’s also this artificial wedge between Abbie and Ichabod. They could do it naturally, and they’re just choosing not to. “Oh, you didn’t tell me about an angel! Oh, you didn’t follow behind me! But at least you can stop deadly spikes with feeeeelings!”
R: I agree with you that the separation is forced. and the conversation about tending their bond was so contrived. All that dialogue needs some kind of reverse merit badge. Demerit badge.
R: What should be the natural wedge?
G: The Ichabod-Katrina relationship. A difference of opinion over how to handle the Irving situation. Something Jenny has done that Abbie finds unforgivable and Ichabod doesn’t. Reyes firing Abbie and favoring Ichabod in some weird manipulative way. Secret loyalty to and tending of a reborn infant Henry, Voldemort-in-Kings-Cross style. The possibilities are seriously endless. I could do this all day, and they will not listen.
R: YAS. Though they kind of went there already with baby Moloch.
G: They went there with baby Moloch, and then they ruined that too.
R: Some evershifting combination of the many reasons would also work.
G: I feel like we are just fu¢king watching this show squander its potential.
R: Do they need to bring on new writers? I feel like we’re on the verge of making the kind of pitch that Funky Dineva is always making to Shonda Rhimes. Girl, get me on the show!
G: RIGHT?!?!? We would be so damn good at this!
R: This is one case where I would be seriously happy to have any of our ideas stolen if someone would just make better scripts, scenes, and storylines for Abbie, Jenny, and Irving.
G: So in. @TheOrlandoJones, make it so. Though I admit the Irving storyline is my one hope.
R: Dude, who/what brought him back? Is he a vampire? Is he an angel? Will he fight Orion in a battle royale? I would watch that.
G: Yeah, I would too. But would they seriously try to make us believe that Abbie’s loyalties would be divided between Orion and Irving? Because they wouldn’t. I would buy it IF Henry and Orion were both doing the exact same thing for ostensibly opposite reasons, and we had to fight them both. That would be cool.
R: The only thing I beg for, please, is that he not be some Kara-Thrace-style embodied ghost who just disappears when his work is done. By which, I mean when he leads them to Earth/Paradise.
G: I’m still going for Purgatory. His records and lack of criminal charges were clearly possessed.
R: By who? Who did that? So many questions.
G: I don’t know. But it’s literally the only plot point I care about right now.